It has been six months since the day I stepped off Etihad Airways into Abu Dhabi soil. I thought I’d be settling on hot, dry land.

Six months in the desert and it has been raining non-stop for me. Soaked from head to toe, I wonder why God brought me to the barren land only to drench me in tears.

A misleading offer.  A bleak career. A crippling financial burden. A series of dehumanizing events. A shocking news. A broken promise. A crushed heart. A cold response.  A torn spirit.

Every night as my head hits the pillow and the tears begin to flow, I raise my hands in defeat and surrender to the God of this downpour. I sing this song with what’s left of my shattered heart…

I was sure by now, God, that You would have reached down
and wiped my tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it’s still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
“I’m with you”
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

And I’ll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I’ve cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

God’s hand is my umbrella.

–

Song by Casting Crowns (my fave band)