I landed in Nepal at midnight and I was supposed to go straight to the doctor. But I couldn’t.

Have you heard of Nosocomephobia? This is the intense and irrational fear of hospitals, leading to significant anxiety, avoidance behaviors, and panic attacks. This results to difficulty seeking necessary medical care.

I developed this phobia in 2007 when I lived in the hospital for a month before my father died. Now whenever I go inside a medical facility, I have a heightened smell of medicines, blood, and dead people. I can hear the wheels of beds, machines, and metals 3x louder than the normal sound. My blood pressure increases and I black out sometimes.

So yes, it took me so much courage to bring myself to this hospital-clinic the next day.

I googled, “best ENT doctor in Kathmandu,” and he was top of the list: ENT Service by Dr Gyanendra

He did a scan, and this is what my middle ear looked like. I had a ruptured ear drum indeed.

He said this would heal naturally, but it would take some time. I told him I only had a 15-day visa. So he recommended I go back to him after 10 days to get re-checked.

Is that my ear or something else? Haha.

I bought my medicine and hurried to leave before I pass out, but it began to rain. These kind guards helped me book a ride back to my accommodation.

Look, an ambulance!

Back in the hostel, the feeling of loneliness washed over my tired soul. I wondered what to do next.

To be continued…