The Art of Pee-ing Anywhere

I was going through old photos and unearthed this one.

My poor bladder control has rewarded me with a history of almost peeing anywhere.  Certainly, practice makes perfect.

When I was a kid I had countless trips going home to my grandparents in Mt. Province. The trips would last for almost a day, the jeepney traversing through long winding road carved onto the slopes of mountain ranges. It was miles and miles of forests and jungles.

Pee-breaks are the most anticipated moments when everyone would scramble down the jeepney to do any or all of these rituals – stretch aching backs, rub sore butts, chew betel nut and find safe pee-ing spots.

My favorite peeing-spots are as follows (from least to most):

Three. Side of the road with my mom and cousins around me. Umbrellas are also useful bulwark. This is an option only when there is nowhere else to hide in.

Two. Amidst tall grasses while someone stands a few feet away and serves as look-out. The fun thing about this is when the spot gets crowded. Oh, such beauty to see flashes of butt flesh amongst the lushness of grass.

One. Behind a rock where everything is safe… most of the time.

Now that I’m older, I have developed the skill of pee-breaks. The thrill of achievement comes whenever I get away with doing it in the most difficult places.

Case in point, the photo above. This was taken in the middle of the day at Burnham Park, obviously one of the most populated places in Baguio City.

Moral of the story: Develop trusting relationships with people around you. They will be your fortification and defense in times of crisis.

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Or maybe there is no moral at all and I just posted this to gross you out.


6 thoughts on “The Art of Pee-ing Anywhere

    1. hello? ako kadiri? e anong tawag sa inyong umiihi sa pader, sa poste, sa gilid ng sasakyan, sa imburnal, sa puno,sa barb-wire at kung san san pa? bwahahaha!

      Like

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